Ending a usual relationship can be tough but it is far worse when it comes to shutting down what is known as a situationship. There are no expectations and sometimes no even real talk about the breakup. And still, the emotional impact of ending it can be very strong.
The levels of ambiguity attached to such kinds of relationships can complicate things even more. Also, the term situationship defines either a romantic or intimate relationship that falls somewhere between dating and being in a serious relationship. Although people involved can spend a lot of time together and grow emotionally or physically close, their situation is never defined.
As there are no clear rules, people interpret everything in a different way. When the relationship ends, it can actually be pretty complicated.
The absence of closure
In conventional relationships, people usually acknowledge their situation and understand when it has come to an end. In situationships, there can be no clear end.
- What was the negative event?
- Is it possible to try again to say hello?
- Could the situation improve?
You Could Be in Grief of Your Dream
Sometimes, you are not only sad because of the person but also because of the dreams you had for the connection.
You might be expecting that there will be an official relationship at some point. You might look forward to adventures, loyalty, or secrets.
Once the situationship is over, you lose both the relationship itself and the potential one.
This can make you feel the loss more than it is in reality.
Doubt Can Strengthen the Bond
The unpredictable relationship can bring numerous ups and downs. There may be days when you have romantic text messages and deep conversations, and other days could be full of silence. The flatness can make people think a lot about their connection.
Instead of simply realizing that you are dumped, you start trying to get some information from your messages, social networks, etc.
The Loss Is Not Recognized by Others
A further difficulty is that your friends and family may not comprehend why your situation is painful.
Suppose you did not form the relationship. In that case, one might suggest the comment, “But you were not even in a relationship.”
This may lead you to doubt the validity of your feelings about loss.
One does not need any type of relationship status to feel emotional pain. The ties could be important, despite the lack of a formal relationship.
Social Media Makes The Process Harder
Once you end your situationship, social media can be full of reminders.
Seeing what people post, their stories and likes may result in overthinking everything and wanting to interpret every action online as communication from the situation.
Taking a step away from social media can help with creating some emotional distance and eliminating unnecessary triggers.
How to Start the Healing Process
There is no specific timeline for healing from a breakup. Nevertheless, there are a few ways to start the process.
Instead of focusing on your wishes, focus on what has actually happened. Recording the true events of the relationship will help in separating reality from possibilities.
Limiting communication with your partner and social media will assist in claiming back some of your emotional space.
You should not be hard on yourself for taking time to move forward.
Lessons Gained from the Situation
A situationship proves the need for communication, setting boundaries, and establishing clarity in dating.
If you want commitment from your partner, try to communicate it early. Understanding your needs will help in recognizing whether a certain connection meets your needs.
Although a situationship usually does not have a label, the emotions involved can be genuine. The complex combination of doubts, emotional ties, missed opportunities, and limited closure can make the ending of a situationship a very painful process.
If you experience a situationship breakup, allow yourself to grieve the relationship without comparing your pain to other people’s understanding of a “real” relationship. Healing usually comes when we stop thinking about the label and start understanding the significance of the event for us.
