The Fun and Excitement of the Talking Stage
We’ve all experienced the feeling of being entranced late at night after the volume of small sweet messages, funny memes, and endless ‘good morning’ texts made you feel noticed or wanted. The talking stage dating was that phase of dating that occupied that safely exciting representation of modern dating…it felt fluid, light, fun and full of possibilities. You share stories, occupations and things you want to do; and you furnish a warped sense into what could be a situation.
However, somewhere between endless texting and going on dates things seem to reach an obstinate stop. You are texting daily or close to it, but you just feel as though nothing is progressing. You feel an ethereal level of realness, yet you are asking yourself ‘what is this?’ and suddenly you stop, it registers, and you realize that you are in the talking stage dating trap where there is an emotional investment, but no category of definition or commitment.
Talking Stage Stagnation Why We Get Stuck
The reality surrounding the ‘talking stage’ is that it is actually more comfortable than the other stages. You get attention, but it comes without tension. The closeness feels easy, free from emotional demands. And the connection exists, yet carries no sense of responsibility. In this era of ‘situationships’ and dating apps, it is common to enjoy connection without labeling it.
For lots of people, the ‘talking stage’ is seen as a compatibility test. It is the stage that helps people learn about other people’s idiosyncrasies as well as their communication methods and emotional limits. Conversely, the ‘talking stage’ not progressing terrifies me. It gives me the feeling of standing at the edge of a swimming pool. You can sense the water, but the terror of jumping in is immobilizing.
As this stage prolongs, there is a higher probability of too much analysis of the situation. There is a strong sense of feeling that your partner is also developing some unforeseen attachment to you. It is an emotional state best described as being in limbo. You stand in a position that pushes you to seek a strong, binding agreement, yet you avoid the confrontation needed to change the situation.
When Connection Becomes Confusion
At the outset, things feel simple: you laugh at the same things, talk at length, and everything seems easy enough. Once time moves on, though, uncertainty creeps in. The conversations become shorter, and the responses follow suit. You start to think: have they lost interest? Have they found something else?
That can be exhausting because it provides fluctuations in your mood, emotional highs, but doesn’t give you the firm security of the definition of your relationship. One moment you know they like you, the next moment they don’t respond to texts or pull away from conversations. And you certainly can’t ask “What are we?” because that feels like too much.
In fact, you can stay stuck in a prolonged talking stage dating phase and that can interfere with your development of a real relationship. It hooks your emotions, while you remain emotionally stagnant. The future is unclear, and emotionally, your heart is left oscillating between hopeful and hurt.
Moving Forward and Breaking Free First
When stuck in the talking phase, the most challenging but crucial part is deciding what you want and clarifying your intentions is vital. Is this something you want to pursue, or is it nice to have a texting companion?
Having this figured, you proceed to communication. It is the only way to sync to ensure you are both on the same wavelength. Boundaries are a form of self-empowerment and setting them does not mean you are waiting for them to make a move. You are not settling for obligations disguised as dedication and empty promises.
After all, something real is equal to a true connection. Know the difference. There is no justification and no reward for prolonged empty attachment. You lose nothing by walking away and have everything to gain. Love should never feel stuck and it should never remain in the “almost” phase. It is a constant evolution to something tangible, not a constellation of texting at odd hours.
Final Thought:
The talking stage dating trap might seem like an exhilarating rollercoaster ride, but it’s actually the place where many hearts suffer in silence. Genuine love is the one that both partners choose to live by actions and not by words. Therefore, if you are still hoping that your “almost” will eventually become “official,” perhaps it is time to cut the talk and start making decisions.
